UPA (Utanian Press Agency)
Release: August 31, 300 AP.

Advertisements from the Utanian Burovian Movement

The Utanian Burovian Movement have this week been flooding the TV screens of Luka and other Lasanne voters with two advertisements emphasising that the UBM are the "true party of conservatism", not the Conservative Party. The advertising blitz has been concentrated in the Luka-based electorates, Waitaki and Aviemore in the north, Hamilton, Charleston and Gyum'th.

The screen shows a toddler playing with toy soldiers on the living room floor of a typical middle-class Lasanne family home. He's making the requisite explosion sounds while he knocks over some soldiers.

"The Utanian Burovian Movement is committed to conservative values. We believe in individual pursuit and achievement. We believe in commitment to business. We believe in the community and its businesses, not the state. We believe in small government, small taxes and small military spending. It seems, however, that not all conservatives are alike. Others like to play with soldiers and bombs, and spend big dollars on tanks and warships and jet fighters while the real needs of the country, of the people, of the health system, of the business community, are neglected.

"We need serious leaders running this country... not children. When it comes time to vote, remember the Utanian Burovian Movement is about Conservative values, and business, not playing wargames. Business not bombs. What do you think President Hope believes in?

"Utanian Burovian Movement: Conservative values, but without the militarism."

>> Footage of armoured vehicles standing in the streets of I'ana island.

"The Utanian Burovian Movement's Naahi Bennett called the recent excursion into the I'ana archipelago a 'wasteful expense of manpower, fuel and Presidential time'. Without a doubt, the islands belong to Utania, but why couldn't a dozen diplomats sort it out instead of six thousand soldiers and sailors?

"Is that Conservative thinking at work? It's wasteful thinking at work!"

Utanian Burovian Movement advertisement

"Is this minimising costs? No, it's an excuse for a large defence budget, a budget coming from *your* pocket!"

>> Û symbols appear falling from the top of the screen.

"The UBM is committed to Conservative values, not wasting public monies on unnecessary displays of military strength.

"Utanian Burovian Movement: We're about business, not bombs."

Utanian Burovian Movement TV advertisement

©UPA, 300 AP.

©Mike Ham, 2000. All rights reserved. No reproduction without, at least, tacit approval. ;-)