UPA (Utanian Press Agency)
Release: March 17, 301 AP.

Okarvits basks in Dignanian peace

President Okarvits has never looked so pleased with himself. Like President Hope before him, who was able to bask in the glory of the golfers he so controversially sponsored, Okarvits is now basking in the glory of the Dignanian peace in which Utania played a critical role.

Though Parliament began a three-week recess last Friday-week, President Okarvits has been able to use the media to declare that he was vindicated for his continued support for the peace in Dignania, despite the continued opposition by the conservative parties.

Ironically, it was Conservative former-President Hope who had originally dispatched troops to Dignania, though it certainly was Okarvits who increased the commitment from 800 to over 10,000 peacekeepers, and appointed the charismatic General Gordain. Though Hope continues to support President Okarvits' efforts in Dignania, his Conservative Party rival and federal Parliamentary opposition leader Thomas Kemp has resolutely opposed them as "an expensive personal crusade for Okarvits' reelection". Today, President Okarvits is vindicated, and Kemp was silent... for about 30 seconds.

This morning, Mr Kemp congratulated the Dignanian parties for their achievement of peace, and thanked the Utanians who served there, while carefully avoiding attributing any kudos to the President. He then asked "when will the President stop with this foreign crusading and concentrate on crusading at home?" Analysts agree that the President has had far more success on the international front, with trade deals and an armistice, than here in Utania.

Regardless, the President is right to bask in the sun for the moment, for he has fought hard in the capital, Utan Krysaror, on behalf of the peacekeepers, and they know it: General Gordain faxed a short note to Okarvits announcing the peace that read "Peace in Dignania achieved. We've achieved what we came here to do, because you kept the issue back home apolitical - my personal thanks for this".

©UPA, 301 AP.

©Mike Ham, 2001. All rights reserved. No reproduction without, at least, tacit approval. ;-)